3 Things To Know Including What A Cop Told Me 30 Years Ago That Changed My Life
by heidi_behr | Jul 4, 2018 | Love, Preserving Relationships, Self-care Practices
I have three awesome things to share with you!
1) My new series Conversations that Shape Our Lives premieres this week (I’m guest-writing on NotSalmon.com! SO COOL!) The first installment: Learning to Leave Work at Work (aka “How a cop changed my life 30 years ago” and how what he told me still makes a positive difference in my life today).
2) How long-term love relationships in the veteran community strengthened during the Project Odyssey Retreat last week with these great tools.
3) How Post-traumatic Growth is a REAL THING.
Life Changing Conversation with a Cop
Thirty years ago, an unlikely conversation with a cop changed my life.
I had been pulled over after driving while crying. While technically not against the law, it still presented problems. Find out what was so upsetting and how this traffic stop and conversation became a catalyst for a lifelong practice I still cherish…..(click here to go to link)
Love and the Wounded Warrior Project Odyssey Couples Retreat in PA
The Couple’s Project Odyssey Retreatin Pennsylvania last week was great!
We had 10 couples who learned how to strengthen and prioritize their Love Relationship/friendship using material from Gottman Method Couples Therapy.
During the retreat, the couples were taught tools and exercises founded on Drs. John and Julie Gottman’s four decades of research and clinical experience with over 3,000 couples.
I love that we were able to use material that is SO effective at helping couples learn what they should DO LESS OF (what tears relationships apart like contempt and stonewalling) and what to DO MORE OF (like how small daily moments of turning toward the person you love and connecting to them with kindness and appreciation make a positive difference in the happiness and longevity of a relationship).
If you want to learn how to use these same tools, go check out the links above and stay tuned– I will be teaching a couples workshop (and retreat) in the upcoming months.
Post-traumatic Growth HAPPENS
Lots of people believe a diagnosis of PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder), means you are destined to feel like $hit the rest of your life –> NOT TRUE!
You can heal from PTSD.(and many other things– but that will be a whole other blog another time!)
Last week, each of the couples who came on the retreat were dealing with issues like PTSD, TBI (traumatic brain injury), depression, anxiety, and most had ailments like insomnia &/or chronic pain.
Many times conditions like PTSD (and those others mentioned above) can make someone feel the need to isolate. Connecting to others or the world around you, when you are drained by not feeling well, or your internal world feels scary, unsafe and unpredictable, can be a really hard task.
The men and women who came on the Odyssey last week were, for the most part, not the healthiest bunch. I think every warrior, and many of their partners, were dealing with sleep troubles and physical pain, in addition to their PTSD, TBI etc diagnoses. Yet THEY ALL SHOWED UP. And they came to WORK on their relationships.
They were not letting their diagnoses get the best of them. They were not alone and they were present, being advocates for themselves. I have to give them big props: WAY TO GO!
If you want things to change in your life, YOU HAVE TO BE PART OF THE CHANGE.Your great mistake is to act the drama as if you were alone.
– David Whyte, from the poem Everything is Waiting for You.If you are reading this and thinking, “Well, I’m not in a relationship so my (insert diagnosis/ailment here)is harder for me” then I want to you know this: you are NOT alone.
Healing happens in connection to something bigger than yourself. It happens when you tune back towards Love.
If you are wondering how to do this, please respond to this post. Call me at 407-252-8035 or email me at heidi@feelpeacenow.com and I can talk with you more about how healing happens.
If you would like to show support for those who have had a hard time, leave a positive comment or emoji beneath this post or send me a reply via email. I am always glad to know if this resonates with you.
Peace be with you. Namaste!
(And btw- I am on VACATION from June 29 – July 8. My next openings are the week of July 9…. Have a good week!!)
(Also, if you would like to read more about my previous work with Wounded Warrior Project retreats, see how I helped stop a panic attack on a pontoon boat with EFT Tapping and the time I danced with a dolphin in the Keys working with WWP.)
